(Using Money As A Mode Of Approach)
It is a clear fact that when young people steps into adulthood, the communication between the opposite sexes diversify into some advancement; some of which culminates into a union considered great at the end and for some to an unending issues with broken tears. Obvious of the fact that nobody is sure of tomorrow; caring parents always teach their adolescent wards the norms to a disciplined future whereas the religion plays its own part.
Over the years, we have derived so much in what goes on in a man-to-woman relationship. Lots of experiences gathered are seemingly weird in nature and yet is persistent in occurrence. Someone could even come up with an ideology of saying “that is just part of it”, but the realities has kept many young growing people sceptic, frightened and questioned in so many ways.
One thing about the funny drama in relationships is that, we all seem to have identified the problems as well as their solutions, but to implement them is just a gap. Almost everyone would think this way “…mine is different” (grin), but believe it or not, they all started like ours; and that is where to start bridging the gap.
There’s this common step many guys (considered rich) take when entering into a relationship. Many of them would want to impress a lady unnecessarily by showing off their financial prowess and by so doing; they would believe that is the normal way to approach a lady.
Inasmuch as a lady would yield, they will make provisions for demands even when not required. This is absolutely a wrong step in a right direction as some disciplined ladies evaluate it as an arrogant mode of approach. Relationship is not a commodity to be bought with money. God in his infinite mercies made it a privilege to man and woman, insomuch that we cannot undermine the responsibilities charged to both parties involved. These very responsibilities also should not be overtaken by monetary values. Human needs may not arise; but would certainly poke at us every now and then and so cannot be excused whereas money becomes the first and last resort. There’s much value to identify with needs than wants.
However, few times in the past, similar approaches to an unprepared relationship have turned out to be a fragile boundary. It has neither been different nor strange to observe many relationships crashed when flamboyancy fades. This is based on the fact that a lady may not have wished to start up with a man, but due to the way she got persuaded with money gifts; coupled with the fact that such a lady is of low self-esteem; she succumbed and when the money ceases to flow, the desire for the relationship will be averted.
In addition, the idea of using money as a medium of approach in a relationship is a wrong notion that could rather drive fear into men of low financial prowess or confidence because the syndrome would rather trample on their plight for a good intended union, hence no one could determine what the future could bring about.
In this limelight, several numbers of men have the premonition that it requires large sums of money to lavish before they could be considered good for engagements whereas they have little or less, and so they are discouraged.
This is equally a problem which is caused by men (but of other classes) and strongly accelerated by the ladies as it is almost becoming a trend. Mere likely, the reasons are to escape economic downturn but this degenerating situation has more effect on the women hence it takes men more to accomplish before getting into a responsible union. It also has bewildered so many other guys who are not of this category as it had cost them a lot to overcome. Be it as it may, it pleases the mind of those who are buoyant enough to continue in that style even as much as robbing other people’s desire; but the bottom-line reads vanity. It contradicts the divine master plan of man and woman relationship.
Owing to the fact that marital union is necessary, the assertion should incline in these forms:-
Be yourself and do not struggle to impress anyone (This unveils your real emotion).
Spend money when it is needed and avoid demands that could be substituted (This defines your financial policy).
Show concern (This interprets how tolerant and respectful you are).
These inclinations in several occasions have proven unbeatable happiness in relationships as long as there is an understanding from every misunderstanding. A man should bear in mind that a woman’s desire for material acquisitions are insatiable; and should be ready to attend to the necessary contemporaries but once a man succumbs to every demand, it becomes a routine; he will have to continue it; otherwise there will be imbalances which may kick off any day his financial prowess becomes unfit carry all.
Do we care to ask “why?” It’s quite clear that when evil deeds are often exhibited, they suddenly become tradition and it is usually said “first impression matters”.
Remarkably, a man should note that his pride relies on his wealth (money) just in the same way a woman’s pride relies on her body. Money to a man is to discharge his responsibilities as well as taking care of the woman (wife). He cannot afford to carry out the duties of a woman such as child-bearing; therefore, if a man not in this right course spends just to please a woman or make her say yes, he should know that it is a Buy-Back or Pay-As-You-Go affair. It has gone contrary from the original theme. A man who does so simply trade on his value without the slightest idea but if care is not taken retrogression follows up. He’s soon to lose sense of belongings just because he believes that he can always get another choice with money.
Approximately, women who are submissive for the sake of money easily turn away when there is none. Then ask yourself, “How many more ladies will I have to buy over before I can get real satisfaction?” Money spent unnecessarily to acquire a relationship is like money sprayed over a stripper. She gets dressed and leaves the onlookers in an enthusiastic imagination which keep knocking on the memory and makes them want to pay for more. It’s worthless and nothing to count on because the stripper will always dance but could the fans always pay to watch?
A man should not pretend to impress a woman hoping that it will resolve well. It has never been a good input in similar forms. It is rather negative to offer with the aim of having her back in a relationship. If you are found in this manner then women would fall prey to your traps with the intension of emptying your pride. Be of good help and offer money gifts when it is just mutual. Love flows like the air and one cannot detect who breathes in or out.
Occasionally, some guys who live on a good financial standard are often shy to approach women; as such they are usually caught up in this act. They capitalize in spending more to attract women to themselves. They don’t see anything wrong in that inasmuch as it takes little or nothing out of them and besides, they could be helpless if they can’t reach a lady that way. The belief of such guys is that their money could do the talking for them. Believe this rhetorical fact; flirts are on the prowl for guys like this whereas situations like this are almost helpless. Opportunities like this could usurp and such a good motive could be ruined as well as someone’s innocence.
In conclusion, it is often said that a person’s faith sets him whole. In the time past, so many guys have meant well and got slapped in the face likewise so many ladies having tried stingy and broke guys but got dumped; word after word, advice upon advice and teaching after teaching; all depends on the assimilation of the hearer. It starts being effective after hearing and setting a pace without the insinuation that mine is different. Consider the relationship which you are into as having rubbles if not in a smooth with your heart when alone and by that the help and change can start just from you.
Author: Danny Ndukwu (Zeduks)
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